10 Things to Improve your Game by 150%
Posted by Jeremy Soul in Dating Tips, Day Game, Lifestyle Tips, Mindsets
Hi Guys,
I just came back from the Real Man Conference in Amsterdam, where I gave a kicka*s speech on utilising your emotions when dealing with your inner game and dating women. When you’ve been doing this stuff for years, you have a tendency to look at things from a bigger perspective and wax philosophical about underlying principles in social interactions, your own internal processes and those of women.
With that in mind, today I’d like to do the opposite and offer my top ten practical tips for guys who are fairly new to dating science or those who are reaching serious plateaus in their game. Implement these and I personally guarantee you that you will see improvements in your overall life as well as in your success with women.
1. Stop reading all dating forums for two weeks. Bar yourself from reading, writing, or replying to any posts on any internet dating science forum. You will discover that time spent working on yourself is more valuable that arguing, debating or defending any aspect of dating science.
2. Get a brand new haircut or hairstyle. Chop it, style it, dye it. Do something to it to make it look different to how it is now. I recommend going to a good stylist (ask friends with good hair for recommendations). Your friends will have mixed reactions to it (most people don’t like change), but women will react positively to it.
3. Pick one skill that’s not dating that you can commit to getting better at, e.g. hip hop dancing, thai boxing or cooking. Find a good class for it and commit to going at least once a week.
4. Start reading a GREAT novel (I recommend Shantaram, Atlas Shrugged or Musashi) and carry it around with you whenever you are out and about. It gives you an excuse to sit in a café and chill (with plenty of opportunities to speak to women around you) and can even get women opening you if they recognise the book.
5. Book a weekend trip away to a city that you’ve heard great things about (my personal favourites are Stockholm, Barcelona and Riga). Grab ONE friend if you can, but otherwise go by yourself. Don’t go with more than one person otherwise you’ll have a tendency to “hang out” with each other instead of actively talking to new people and meeting women. Talk to every remotely attractive woman you see from the moment you get to the airport. You can find cheap flights if you sign up to budget airline newsletters; use couchsurfing if you want to get free accommodation.
6. Book a longer two-week or month-long break to somewhere on another continent, e.g. Asia. Travel ALONE. The life lessons you will learn from doing this are worth at least six months of social interaction on your home turf (where you have the safety net of friends, your local bars, your culture etc.). You’ll h ave to pl an this one a few months in advance. Dip into your savings if you have to – that’s what they’re there for.
7. Every time you talk to a girl for longer than 5 minutes in the daytime, ask her out to do some activity with you in the next few days (even if it’s just “grabbing a drink to find out more each other”).
8. Every time you talk to a girl for longer than 30 minutes in a bar or nightclub, ask her to come to another bar/place for food with you that you know nearby.
9. Every time you are on a date with a girl and it lasts for over 90 minutes, ask her if she’d like to have another drink back at your place (assuming you picked a date spot that is close to your place).
10. The next ten times someone asks you to do something, go somewhere, or help them out with something, say “Yes.” You will get into some crazy and uncomfortable situations, but will learn a lot from the experiences and have some great stories to tell afterwards. Making bad decisions is healthy once in a while. Disclaimer: I am not responsible for anything that may happen to you as a result of being a “Yes Man”.
Soul


Hi Soul,
Great suggestions, especially No. 1!
No. 2..I’ll get out the Grecian 2000
No. 3..I’ve just started singing lessons with a great teacher, phenomenal
No. 4..I’ve not read a novel for a long, long time. I’ll try one of your suggestions.
No. 5.. I can recommend Riga and going by yourself.
No. 6.. It’s back to Brazil in February 2009
No. 7.. Met a cute American girl (half Japanese/half Irish!!) on Sunday in St. Jame’s Park, went on instant date for coffee, walk etc.
No. 8..So if you talk to 10 girls for three minutes do you invite them all out for food?
No. 9..similar to No. 8
No. 10.. yes!!
PierreX
Good post man love the new blog. done most of them myself allready but could use a haircut and to get back in the gym.
This is exactly what I was looking for. This is an interesting perspective. You informed me! Thx.
I can say after doing TONS of solo travel in foreign continents that that is some of the most valuable “medicine” for amping your identity, game, life, confidence, intrapersonal knowledge, integrity, all that good stuff. A million self-help books and hundreds of seminars can’t come close to what you gain from solo travel. Consuming books/seminars is at times very helpful but usually it’s force-feeding and burying your identity. When you travel, there’s none of that. It’s unraveling who you are and what you’re about. It can be very challenging and different. That type of travel is so essential though.
Great list. Solo travel is on my list of things to do.
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I’ve been thinking about what I read really carefully before I commented, but Im honestly just still not sure what to say here.
Well, ofcourse this all helps giving you a better feeling about YOU. Because with these suggestions you are improving your overall life.
But for ‘game’ I only like the ones that say; when you talk longer than 5 minutes, ask her out.
What I use when I hit a slumb / plateau;
1. I take a few steps back – What used to work for me before I hit the plateau?
2. I go insane – Approach asap and escalate unexpected and HARD.
3. try to f*ck up some convo’s on purpose to get some insane rejections -> removes my outcome dependency
4. I do what I want in the club, to stay in ‘state’
5. I make sexual eye contact and open right away, directly.
6. I try new things, or be less sexual. I go for the number instead of sex right away. Take it slow (this goes against no.2 but you should do these 2 points on another night)
7. I take a look in my life, maybe there’s some stuff bothering me that effects my game, I solve them asap
8. I stop meeting women for at least a week.
9. I’ll keep investing enough time in other activities.
That’s my 2 cents on it.